“I am waiting for something to happen in my life but I don’t know what it is.” If this resonates with you, this exercise may be valuable to you.
Self-Observation on my waiting for something to happen
- I don’t know what I am waiting for.
- I don’t want to do anything else until this happens. Even if I don’t know now what I am waiting for, I will know when it happens.
- I am afraid to go all in on things until that something happens because I am afraid that I will make a mistake or go in the wrong direction.
- I feel very uneasy.
- I feel that I am at a standstill.
- There are a lot of things that I don’t want to do. And when I have to do something that I don’t want, it is giving me a hard time.
- I want to calm down. Is that all I am waiting for?
- Am I missing love or attention? Or admiration?
- I feel like a victim.
- The thing I am waiting for is not something I lost but something I did not get maybe.
Chain of thoughts coming when I am able to go deeper
- I feel stuck.
- I want to feel ready.
- While I am waiting I am calming myself with addictions…This is how I cope with the stress that comes with it.
- I am waiting because I do not feel safe to move, to do something.
- I am realizing that this waiting is actually a sign of a level of intelligence.
- I am starting to realize that this thing I am waiting for will happen in me, not outside of me.
- I want to feel whole. This is the core of why I am waiting
- If I think of God and want to find out if there is something I want from her, then I feel some guilt: Because I want God to show up… I want to know that God exists.
- I need to make a change. It won’t come from outside. I want a change.
The above self-observation exercise is just one possible flow of associations. It is meant to stimulate you and by no means it is implied that it is about you.
(If you are new to the concept of self-observation or looking for some practical guidance then maybe read this article: How Self-Observation Works)
