The strength of phrasing my problems in a short and basic way is about deeply understanding my own Self.

This article is one of the most important ones on Self Chatter as it introduces a very powerful tool that can help you to become more conscious, can give you a real boost in your self-observation, and help you to make huge steps. 

What is it all about?

We certainly all want to solve and overcome our problems. And I am not saying anything new either when I realize that we think about our problems all the time (well, this site’s name is pretty much about this). Did you ever wonder why it is that we put such an enormous amount of energy into trying to solve our problems and yet we are pretty ineffective? This article is not about why it is so hard to solve our problems, but it is rather a description of a tool that can help. Nevertheless here is some food for thought that may help to understand why the below works. (1) Experience shows that a certain level of deepness is needed for a problem to resolve. The closer I can get, the higher my chances are that the window of opportunity comes my way. (2) It is very hard, if ever possible to solve a conflict if I do not connect the dots, if I do not make it conscious in my mind. So any tool that helps to sort out the underlying cause-and-effect relationship will be very valuable.

The method

Phrasing my problem

I know it sounds obvious but you have to phrase it. Otherwise, you run the risk of just endlessly ‘circulating around it’. This is much more important than it looks because it is so easy to be unconscious when we are in a conflict, a great deal of anxiety, or stress. So a recommendation is to put this in your mind that you will phrase your problem when the problem comes.

Why basic?

• When you are basic it is a sign that you have gone deep. And honest.
• Your Self is basic. In the best way possible.

Why short?

• Your Self hardly phrases thoughts and emotions in 30-word sentences. 
• When your phrasing is short enough, it usually means that you have worked on it a lot, you cut out the unneeded or ‘already solved’ things, and you have overcome confusion.

Resonate

Go with what resonates with you. Your thought about your problem is only yours, no one else needs to understand it. What matters is that it is true to you.

An example

“Why don’t I get what I want?” – It is short, it is basic (and it does resonate with me).

How to give it a try? How to start?

• Let things happen. Let your intuition and consciousness do the work and not always your logical, mechanical mind.
• Connect the dots. On the level of your thoughts, this is what you are doing. You are finding cause-and-effect relationships. An example could be: “I developed a sense of lack because in my family of origin my family members had this mindset and I ‘learned’ this mindset from them.
• Tell yourself that you are going to do it.
• Write down your thought, say it out loud, talk about it with someone you trust. Make it external and conscious.